I get by with a little help from my "bloody amazing, unwavering" friends
It triggers all kinds of feels for me.
On a totally unrelated topic to this blog, has anyone ever asked you what award you would want to win?
If you could be talented in ANYTHING, what talent would you want to have (remember, this is pure fiction).
And using that amazing talent, what award would you want to win?
Hold onto your hats ladies because though in real life my singing can make ears bleed, glass shatter and people flee impending doom.
I, would want to win the Best Female R&B Grammy Award. 🌟
Dreams are free right?
All the work we have been doing to pull Hey Mama Movement together has meant many a solo car trip to Auckland from Hamilton on the motorway for me over the last year.
And that is my prime time to shine.
I sing at the top of my lungs.
Very emotively. 👩🎤
Hands flailing around the air.
Imaginary microphones are used. 🎤
And in standstill traffic.
At peak times.
When there are cars all around me.
(I would just like to say that anyone who has been there with me at the same time.
I see you.
I know you are there.
Potentially judging me.
But my heart and soul are full.
And, you, are welcome!)
I hope it brings them a wee smile. ✌️
Anywho, to the topic at hand.
The other day I heard a song and it just began writing a story in my head and pulling a year's worth of experiences together.
“I get by with a little help from my friends” - Written by the Beatles, later redone by Joe Cocker.
Funnily enough some of the other lyrics pertain to the first part of my yarn:
“What would you think if I sang out of tune?
Would you stand up and walk out on me?
Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song
And I'll try not to sing out of key”
Yet again, I digress
In my experience, when you have an idea, it can be a lonely place to sit.
You believe in it.
You believe it can help people.
You believe you are the right person to lead the charge.
You believe that everything will work itself out.
It has to right?!
It’s a great idea!
It needs to happen!
It will help lots of people!
Well, not so much.
People agree, “it is a great idea”!
They encourage you to go forth and make a difference in the world.
Like a lost wee duckling trying to avoid deep potholes!
“You’ll be right!”
Like an old western film when a tumbleweed rolls down the main street with no one around.
That level of loneliness.
That level of uncertainty.
Banks don’t fund tech.
Investors don’t invest in ideas.
That limb you go out on, it feels all kinds of unstable.
And you are constantly questioning whether the idea will be able to fly and make an impact in the world.
Which is why the sweet words of Paul and John “I get by with a little help from my friends” hit my heart the other day.
Hey Mama Movement started three years ago because I realised how much I needed people.
Paulie and John Boy, you clever wee fellows!
You get it!
And turns out, I actually missed it!
I didn’t digress at all with those lyrics earlier!
Those lyrics weren't even about singing out of tune and destroying ear drums!
They were about speaking up against the norm!
Being brave enough to challenge the status quo!
Standing up and disrupting accepted outdated notions of right and wrong.
And, they were about knowing your mates would still be there to have your back.
To dig their heels in and stand by you.
To hear you when you speak.
To step “out of the accepted line” and know you are not alone.
To know when you stand for something, your crew are there with you for the ride.
It has been a bumpy road.
That is absolutely undeniable.
I have learnt some steep lessons.
But what makes it ok, is that my friends and family are right there.
Testing out the site.
Getting excited for TV appearances.
Sharing messages on social media.
Asking how they can help.
Connecting me with people.
Being energised and sharing their energy with me when I feel tapped out.
And being the best bloody cheerleaders a girl could ever ask for.
So some learnings to share:
- If singing in the car (albeit like the outtakes of a singing show of those who didn’t make it to Hollywood) makes your soul feel good, then sing the shit out of those lyrics with a smile on your face and a wink to the neighbouring cars. 🗣
- You know what decisions you make feel good and feel true to who you are. You also know the gut feeling when it doesn’t feel good, when you feel uncomfortable and doubtful. Connect to that feeling and don’t allow the status quo or the need to fit in, to be the reason not to speak up, to challenge or to stand for something important.
- Listen to the Beatles. (Honestly. I just don’t think you can go wrong with that advice. It’s solid. Once again, thank you lads!)
- There is so much good in the world. So many great people who will take time out of their ‘busy’ lives for you, be that friends, family, colleagues, or experts in a field you are interested in. Be aware of just how deeply valuable that kindness and time is. Appreciate it and say thank you! ❤️
Lonely, alone, isolated - sometimes we do need the space to think, to digest and to figure shit out.
But the key is not letting your mind tell you that state of lonely is permanent.
It is knowing and trusting that when you need them, your friends, your amigos, your rafiki, your familia, your whanau - your crew - they are always there one hundred percent flying your flag and ready to be in your corner - as you would do for them. ❤️
Maybe it's time you sent that message to let someone know you are still there for them 'no matter what'? (Oh dear, I feel like Ronan and the Boyzone lads may end up inspiring a blog here too!) x